The Deep Breath Before the Plunge

In a little less than a week, I will be saying goodbye to the people I love, and everything I find comfortable only to arrive on the other side of the Atlantic in a world completely unknown to me. Months of paperwork, information sessions, and research are finally paying off. I am SO excited but I would be a filthy liar if I said I wasn't nervous. The truth is...I'm petrified.


While my dad and I were in Pittsburgh prior to New Year's, we had a conversation about the trip. At that point, I knew I was going to Italy for 3.75 months but it still didn't feel real. Dad said, "After New Year's, it'll feel real,". Oh my gosh, he was so right. And as my departure approaches, the scarier that reality becomes.


15 weeks in a foreign country and I don't know a soul. How far can 3 semesters of college Italian really get me?


The beauty of all of it is this: those things that make my spaz out are the same things that make me totally pumped about the next few months. I'm living in that moment before a rollercoaster descends. My toes are hanging off the edge of a cliff and I'm about to jump into the water below. I'm playing limbo with excitement and fear and I'm feeling slightly bipolar. Sometimes, there is not an ounce of fear and all I feel is excited while other times, I am so anxious that I almost dread the next four months.


This is the adventure that I've always dreamed of having. Being pulled completely out of my comfort zone is frightening but necessary for personal growth. Every time in my life in which I have lived in the moment and stayed out of my head has been fabulous. Meeting David Cook, my first real relationship, the second half of senior year. It's my mind that ALWAYS trips me up.


At my core, I truly believe that I am an adventurous person and I have let stagnancy and the safety of routine suppress that desire for a grand adventure. But like a roller coaster or cliff diving, the worst part of it is the anticipation, the hour wait in line for the Goliath, the moment before the jump. And that's where I am. But, in a few days, I will have taken the plunge and slain what I expect to be the fire-breathing dragon of this journey.


So, here I go. I just hope I don't hit any rocks on the way down.


~Britt


"For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." ~ Joshua 1:9